Eyes of Light and Darkness
by theschwa72
Summary: AU (or really UA). Issei Hyodo is shy, has no friends, and lives with his only remaining relative, his grandfather on his mom's side. One day, he gets home and is notified that his grandpa is at the hospital, and rushes there to see him. This is a fic with all the world-building of the canon, but with little following of the plot points. Polyamorous, Bisexual, Angsty Issei.
1. Chapter 1: A New Beginning

Chapter 1: A New Beginning

Issei Hyodo walked out of his high school, shoulders slumped, head down. His short brown hair was blowing a little in the wind, and the expression he wore was emotionless, hazel eyes lifeless. Issei looked up at the pale blue sky, wondering what he'd done to deserve the life he'd gotten.

_Why is my life like this? Why am I stuck with the things that I am? Why did _that_ have to happen? _

Issei began the walk home, knowing that only his grandfather was waiting for him, and a tear formed in his left eye. It was always his left eye, never his right, that teared up. His left eye could have a river flowing out of it, but his right never shed a drop. He had only just gotten out of the school gate when he heard a voice behind him say,

"Wait up!" Issei turned to look, hoping it was him that the words were directed at, but saw a girl with long, flowing crimson hair he knew was Rias Gremory running towards a blond boy Issei recognized as Yuuto Kiba, the so-called "prince" of the school.

Issei saw the attractiveness in Yuuto's face, but knew that Yuuto would never look twice at him, since Issei's features were nowhere near as attractive as Yuuto's; Issei, in fact, had been informed on multiple occasions that he looked as if he'd fallen from heaven - since his face was so ugly, he must have broken it on the way down.

Issei didn't understand why children were so cruel; he never remembered wanting to hurt someone that badly, except God, for giving him the life he had. Yet, it always seemed as though someone was out to get him. Issei knew that wasn't true, since few would have anything personal against him - but sometimes he couldn't shake the feeling that there was something trying to make his life miserable.

Issei now had multiple tears in his left eye, seeing Yuuto turn around behind Issei and begin to talk to Rias. Jealousy and sadness were becoming overwhelming emotions in Issei's mind, so he turned around and began to run, a mantra running through his thoughts.

_They can be happy. You're not good enough. They can be happy. You're not good enough. They can be happy. You're not good enough._ Issei reached his house, out of breath, and opened the door.

"I'm home," he mumbled, taking off his shoes and going up to his room. Then he realized that his grandfather was not at the kitchen table like he normally was when Issei came home from school.

_Is he taking a nap?_ Issei wondered, slightly curious as to why his grandfather was not in his usual spot, reading the paper. He walked up the stairs to his grandpa's bedroom, looking in there, but not seeing his grandpa. He then heard the phone ring, and thought,

_That must be him, knowing that I'd miss him. He's probably out somewhere for groceries or something._ He picked up, not bothering to look at the caller ID, and then heard an unfamiliar voice.

"Hello, is this Issei Hyodo?"

"Um, yes?"

"I see. This is Tokyo General Hospital, calling to inform you that your grandfather, Yoshida Hyodo, I believe, has been admitted here for a heart attack, earlier today. He requested that you be notified that he was here as soon as possible." Issei almost dropped the phone.

_No, he couldn't have - he's healthy! I can't lose him too!_

"Is it possible for me to see him?"

"Yes, he requested that a method of transportation be arranged so that you could see him. A cab has been sent to your residence, you won't need to pay, since it's been pre-paid."

"I... see."

"It should arrive shortly, so thank you for your time, and goodbye." The person hung up and Issei muttered into the phone,

"...Bye."

On the exterior, as Issei went outside, he supposed he might look calm, or emotionless. But, on the inside, Issei felt a torrent of emotions rising up inside him.

_How could this happen?_ Disbelief. _Why me? Why not someone else? _Anger. _I'll give up anything just to get him back, so please, God, give him back! _Sadness. _I should have talked to him more, appreciated him more!_ Regret. _I'm not good enough. _Hurt. Issei wanted to simply disappear, so that he wouldn't have to confront his emotions as he sat on the steps.

Eventually the cab came, and took him away from his home, to go and see his grandfather.

###

Issei was brought in to see his grandpa, the man who had raised him since his parents had died in a car crash. He was surrounded by medical equipment, and Issei heard his grandfather's breathing, quick and shortened, and saw the rises and falls of his grandfather's chest to confirm it.

"Issei, come here," Issei heard from his grandpa, a weak and raspy voice, and obeyed. "If I die, which I very well might, I need you to look in The Box that I've kept from you. The key is under my pillow, and my will should keep you stable financially, at least until after high school. However, I can't do anything about your emotional stability, but I will suggest that you try to make friends either way, whether I live or die, so that you can share your life with other people than me."

"Grandpa, I -" Issei began, tears welling up in his left eye, as usual when he cried.

"Issei! You must stay strong. The document in The Box should explain enough of it, so you should be able to get by."

"Enough of what? Grandpa, I don't understand -"

"You will soon enough." Issei's grandfather's voice took on a new urgency. "Issei, it is not fair by any stretch of the word that you might lose me, your last living family member, but it might be soon be reality. You _need_ to find others to take care of you, to support you, so that you can _live_, not just _survive_, in this world."

"I love you, Issei, but others can too, and they just haven't met you. That's what you need to do - get to know others, so that you can learn to love them and they you."

"Grandpa, I wish I'd -"

"Do not tell me what you regret, Issei, and do not even focus on it in your thoughts. Focus on the _good_ times you had with me, the fun you had, the positives! Do not get lost in the nothingness of not caring. I -" Issei's grandfather coughed violently, then spoke two words, very quickly and softly, but Issei knew he heard them correctly. "Stay strong." Issei looked at the person who had raised him for half of his life who had stopped moving, and felt his body go into a state of panic, and got dragged out of the room by a pair of nurses.


	2. Chapter 2: An Ending

** A/N: I enjoyed writing this. It was heartbreaking, but enjoyable, in a weird way. Hope you all enjoy reading it!**

Chapter 2: An Ending

Issei was sitting in his house - yes, he supposed it was _his_ house now, since his grandfather had died in front of his eyes at the hospital. The funeral had been the day before, and Issei had been absent for several days, ever since it had happened. He clenched his fists as he thought about who would miss him.

_No one will miss me, not even the teachers. I've done decently, but not _amazing_, by any stretch of the word. I'm just a cyst on life, an eyesore in the world. Why did it have to be me? Why did it have to be me? Because I'm not good enough for anyone to stay around, that's why. I wasn't good enough for mom and dad to stay alive, and I wasn't good enough for grandpa to either. _

_ I'm just a failure; I should just disappear before I make anyone else die. _Issei buried his face in his hands. _I'm not good enough. I'm not good enough. I'm not good enough._ The mantra ran through his head, until he remembered something. _The Box! Grandpa said the key was under his pillow, so now I can open it. But what's in it? Why does it matter, though? It's not like it can bring Grandpa back to life, can it? I suppose I have nothing better to do. _Issei got up, realizing that he had tears in his left eye again. _Well, that's hardly a new development, is it?_ He climbed the stairs to his grandpa's room, and opened the door. Lifting the pillow, he saw the shining glint of metal.

Eagerly, Issei picked up the key, admiring its silver color. He went back downstairs and got The Box down from the counter, placing it on the oak table. He looked a bit for the keyhole, finally finding it on top. He inserted it, twisted, and saw the box open, the top splitting into two halves, the keyhole on one. Inside The Box was a collection of several papers.

_A few papers? That's what Grandpa wanted me to get? His dying wish, or whatever? What kind of a joke is this? May as well look at them, to make sure they're useless, though._ Issei put his hand in The Box, pulling out the collection. The first paper read, "To My Dear Issei" in bold at the top, and then Issei read the rest of the first page. It was in rather large font, so it was quite easy.

"Issei, by the time you read this, all your family members will have died. No one will take you in based on your familial relation, since all you have are second cousins and the like. Me, your father, and your grandfather - We all will be gone from your life." Issei frowned. _Is this Mom who wrote this?_

"However, you must remain strong. There are those that will try to attack you, to kill you, to remove you from The Game. You have to understand this, otherwise you won't survive, much less live."

_The Game? What the hell is that? Attack me? What is she talking about?_

"Make friends, Issei, but also remember that not everyone is someone that is good for you. I now will tell you about your eyes, the reason your left eye cries rivers and your right doesn't shed a tear."

_How did she know that? Is there a reason?_

"Your left eye is the Eye of Light - the eye of creation. Your right eye is the Dark Eye - the eye of nothingness."

_What the hell? What is this "Eye of Light", "Dark Eye"? Is this a prank?_ In spite of that thought, Issei continued reading.

"You have the power to create or destroy anything you want - you just need the strength to do so. Train your mind, your body, and your spirit, so that you can be ready when The Test comes."

_The Test? What's that?_

"You _will_ be tested, have no doubt about that, in ways other than the physical and material aspects. Your emotions will be tested, Issei, as well as your resilience and mental stability. And to survive that, you need friends, people you can trust, people you can count on."

"Your eyes - they are a phenomenon called 'Sacred Gears'. A Sacred Gear is an item embedded in a human's body that has amazing powers. Your eyes are unique in that they are passed down from possessor to possessor genetically, and that more than one person can have them at the same time."

"Your father possessed the Dark Eye, and I possessed the Eye of Light. Both were passed down to you, and now you must train them - train them, and yourself, to be able to survive the coming storm."

"You have no idea what I'm talking about when I refer to The Test, and I cannot say much, but will this:"

_Damn right I don't know what you're talking about!_

"There exist three supernatural powers in the world, that of angels, that of devils, and that of fallen angels. You will inevitably come into contact with one or more of these powers; ally with them if you can, and fight them off the best you can if you can't."

"The last two things I have to say are that your father and I weren't killed in a car crash, as I had your grandpa tell you in advance, before we died; we were killed by a rogue member of one of the three factions. I want you to know that I love you, Issei. Go out into the world, and stay strong. Goodbye."

_What? Angels? Devils? _Fallen_ angels? I mean, God exists, but the others? But, mom wouldn't put something in here that wasn't true, would she?_ Issei's tears were spilling onto the letter, and he clenched the fist of the hand he wasn't holding the letter in. _I think I need a walk, because I _really_ don't feel sane right now._

###

Issei was walking, or, more accurately, stumbling along the side of the street in the light rain, making his hair wet, but not wet enough to make him go back inside.

_What does this mean? Fallen angels? Devils? This doesn't make sense..._

Issei made his way to the park with a fountain, the one he used to always go to when he was feeling upset. _And aren't I upset right now._ He sat down on the edge of it, and sighed, trying to let go of all the pain and sadness and hurt that he carried. It didn't work. He looked up at the cloudy sky, and began to cackle.

"God!" he cried, laughing insanely in between phrases. "If you exist, make this pain end! Smite me down with a lightning bolt, or something like that! Make me stop existing!"

"Calling to God, human boy?" a deep voice sounded from behind Issei, and he turned to see a man with black feathered wings sprouting out of his back. "It won't work. God will never bother with the likes of you, pathetic as you are." _What the fuck? Black wings? Is he a devil or a fallen angel? So the letter was right!_

"Who're you!" Issei shouted, and the man laughed.

"You may call me Dhonasheek as long as you continue to live. Which, I regret to inform you, will not be much longer."

"What do you mean?" Issei asked, and then felt his eyes burn. He closed them and held his hands up to cover them, screaming in pain, and heard an evil-sounding laugh.

"Issei Hyodo! Thank God for the fact that your pitiful life will be ended right now - by me, Dhonasheek!" Issei felt a sharp, stabbing pain in his abdomen, and opened his eyes to see a glowing red spear right through it. He heard the flap of wings, and assumed, as he fell to the ground, that Dhonasheek had flown off. Issei knew that he couldn't live for long, but saw the blood on his clothes, and it reminded him of something.

_Rias Gremory... Her hair is this color, the color of my blood. I wish I'd been happy like she is, like Yuuto Kiba is. But that's ok, since I'm not good enough. I was never good enough. Was this The Test? I guess it doesn't matter anymore. I'm dead, aren't I? Or soon to be. Goodbye, world of pain. Hello, world of nothingness._


	3. Chapter 3: A Resurrection of the Body

**A/N: In this story, this is Issei's first year at high school, so Koneko is not present. Just a bit of clarification for why she's not in the ORC. Also, thanks to all who reviewed, followed and favorited! It really helps me out and boosts my writing motivation! **

**With that, enjoy!**

Chapter 3: A Resurrection of the Body

"Issei, wake up!" a light voice told him, and Issei opened his eyes slowly, not remembering when he had gone to sleep. "Issei, wake - President, he's awake!" Issei saw Yuuto Kiba in front of him, blocking part of a cloudy sky, and blinked, then thought,

_What is this? Why is Yuuto here? And "President"? Who's that?_

"Um... where am I?" Issei asked, and then remembered being skewered by a glowing red spear. "Dhonasheek, he killed me, didn't he?" The second sentence was murmured, and Issei unconsciously touched his abdomen, trying to feel if he still had a stab wound.

_A dream? But it felt so real..._ Issei saw Rias Gremory come over, and his eyes widened. _She must be the president Yuuto was talking about, she runs the Occult Research Club, doesn't she? _

"Issei, how are you feeling?" she asked, and Issei wondered, _Is this the afterlife? Rias Gremory... She has much better people to talk to than me. So what is this?_

"Is this the afterlife?" he blurted, and Rias shook her head, smiling.

"Why do you ask?"

"Because, well, because you're, you're talking to me, and, you know, you have much better people to talk to, so I'm just a little confused, that's all." Issei closed his eyes in embarrassment, knowing that he'd stammered quite a bit, and he always hated it when he stammered, especially around people he didn't know well, which were the ones he did it the most around.

Rias laughed, and replied,

"No, this isn't the afterlife; it's the world as you know it. You've been reincarnated, though - as a devil."

"A _devil_? What are you - the letter in The Box was true? Devils _do_ exist?" Issei asked the last two questions intently, hoping that he'd receive an answer that confirmed it.

"Yes, we do - I'm a devil, as well as Yuuto, and Akeno as well. Us three make up the Occult Research Club - we call it the ORC."

"Wait, you're _devils_? Like, those things with horns and wings that try to tempt humans and stuff?"

"The second thing, and the third thing to an extent - We don't steal their souls or anything, we just take a bit of their life force."

"Did you take _my_ life force?" Issei asked, sitting up and trying to scoot away from Rias, but she forced him back down again with her hand.

"No, and you have _no_ reason to be sitting up. You just got reincarnated after being killed by a spear of light - and even _if_ you have both the Eye of Light and the Dark Eye, you still don't have the stamina to do that."

"But, it's cold out here," Issei protested, and indeed it was. Issei's hairs stood on end, and Rias sighed.

"Yuuto, should we bring him to the clubhouse?"

"I don't see why not, Rias - we'll need to induct him anyway."

"Good point. Can you carry him pick him up? I'll do the teleportation circle."

"Sounds good," Yuuto finished, and carefully picked Issei up, who closed his eyes.

_Teleportation? Of course, and here I was expecting something that made sense. At least to my old thinking, this would be impossible, but apparently it's not. _

"Ready?" Rias asked, and Yuuto replied,

"Yup!"

"Issei?"

"Yeah," Issei replied with reservation. _What's this going to do? Is it going to disassemble and reassemble me? Won't that -_

"Good, we're going!" Rias said, and Issei saw a red light through his eyelids, and he curled into a ball, frightened, but Yuuto whispered,

"It'll be ok, Issei," into Issei's ear, and Issei relaxed, not knowing why, except that Yuuto's voice made him feel safe.

###

Issei saw a room form around him, complete with couches, pentagram posters on the walls, and a yew desk.

"What are those posters -"

"Issei, we're in the ORC club room," Yuuto told him, and Issei nodded in recognition.

"Put him on the couch," Rias ordered, presumably to Yuuto, and Issei saw Yuuto nod, then felt himself being placed onto a soft couch.

_Wow, this is a really soft couch. How did this club _pay_ for it? Also, those posters are _huge_! _

"Issei, do you remember anything before you died?" Rias questioned, her voice soothing and calm, but firm. "I need you to remember who did this to you."

"I, I think I know, it was a guy with black feathered wings, and he told me his name was Dhonasheek. I think that's a fallen angel?"

"You're right," Yuuto said, voice energetic. "Haven't we heard that name before, Rias? During the recent skirmish between the fallen angels and Viana's group - wasn't Dhonasheek the name of the leader of the fallen angel side of that battle?"

"Yes, you're right!" Rias affirmed, then turned to Issei. "Then he was hunting the bearer of the Dark Eye and the Eye of Light, most likely, but were you that much of a threat?"

"Um, no?" Issei answered uncertainly. "I don't think so?"

"Well, he _does_ have the Dark Eye and the Eye of Light, so he could _plausibly_ become a threat," a new, female-pitched voice said. "And they wouldn't want to wait until he became powerful, so they killed him right away. It all makes sense, actually."

"Is that what you think, Akeno?" Rias asked, and Akeno came into Issei's field of vision, nodding her head.

"Did you have a hard day?" Akeno questioned playfully, and Issei, intimidated, nodded slightly. "Oh really, cute boy? Did you -"

"I'm not cute," Issei protested.

"Yes, you are," Akeno replied, then continued. "Did you get hurt by a mean fallen angel? Aww, you poor thing."

_Why is she doing this? Why can't she just leave me alone?_ Issei wondered, and cringed as Akeno leaned in closer.

"Well? _Did_ you get hurt by a fallen angel?" Issei, again, nodded slightly, and Akeno leaned back. "Cute boys, especially submissive ones, shouldn't have to fight mean fallen angels, should they, Rias?"

"Back off, Akeno," Yuuto said forcefully. "He needs space."

"My, aren't you pushy? What's he mean to you, anyway?" Akeno said, pulling away from Issei and going over to Yuuto.

"He's the newest member of Rias's peerage, so he deserves to be treated well, since he's one of us now," Yuuto countered, and stood up to his full height, and to Issei it looked like he had about two inches on Akeno, who was also standing at full height.

"I was just teasing him, though, Yuuto, that's all, is there anything wrong with that?"

"What you did should be classified as harassment," Yuuto responded flatly. "You're treating him like a child, when he's a mostly-grown teenager."

"Cut it out, both of you," Rias ordered, and Yuuto and Akeno both apologized using the exact same words.

"I'm very sorry, Rias," and then glared daggers at each other.

"Issei, you'll rest here until you recover your strength, which might be a couple days. After that you can go home to your family, but the ORC will be your club after that -"

"I don't _have_ family," Issei muttered bitterly.

"What did you say?" Rias asked, seeming not to have heard.

"I said _I don't have family_!" Issei said loudly, then blushed, curling up into a ball.

"You're an orphan?" Yuuto inquired quietly, a trace of an emotion Issei couldn't identify in his voice.

"Yes..." Issei trailed off. "My parents died when I was seven, and I was living with my grandfather until a few days ago, when he died of a heart attack." Issei prepared himself for the false politeness, all the "I'm so sorry"s and the "That's terrible"s.

"That's... terrible," Rias said, sounding shocked, but Issei's mind threw all the memories of the fake condolences into the forefront of itself, and he stood up, looked for the nearest exit, and ran out, thinking to himself,

_It's fake, it's fake, it's _all_ fake, it's all so fake, it's fake._ But under that line of thoughts ran another one. _I'm not good enough, I'm not good enough, I'll never be good enough, I never was good enough. I'm not good enough!_

**A/N: Yes, this may be a short-ish chapter, but I really didn't want to combine this with the next chapter with the next, and besides I wanted to update for all my lovely followers and people! Yay! Reviews and favs are nice too! Leave lots of reviews if you can, please! Yay! (I may be hyped up on sugar, but that is neither here nor there.) Thanks for reading!**


	4. Chapter 4: A Healing of the Mind

**A/N: I almost cried while writing this. I tried to make this one a little longer, but not by much, so for those of you who've wanted a longer one, I'll make the next one longer, I promise.**

Chapter 4: A Healing of the Mind

Issei was running down the streets, trying to figure out the quickest way back home.

_Home, when was it ever perfect? Back when I was seven, before they died, everything seemed perfect, but now? Is this, this hell, punishment for those years of perfection? God! Why did you do this to me? Why am I stuck in this world? Is it because I'm not good enough to be anywhere else? That must be it - there's no other explanation. _

_ I'm not good enough, I've known that since... since... when did I figure that out? Was there a time when I _was_ good enough, or just didn't realize that I wasn't? I can't remember!_

_ Maybe there's another reason, though - maybe I did something in a different life, and now I'm paying the price. I was probably a terrible person, and abused power, or something, and now I have a life where I'm powerless! Serves me right - I shouldn't have done something like whatever I did! I still need to go home, because it's the last and only place where I can relax, where I can be who I really am! But why - why did they all have to die? _

Issei tried to open his door, but then found that it was locked. He reached into his pocket for the key, but didn't feel it. Beginning to panic, he reached in the other pocket, and didn't find it.

_God! Why do you punish me like this? I have nowhere else to go! I need my key, so that I can get inside - you of all people would know that! Did it slip out when I died? _

"God!" Issei yelled, and dropped to his knees in front of his door, on his porch, tears pouring out of his left eye. "Help me! Do something! I can't endure this anymore!" He heard wing beats behind him, and turned to face what he assumed was a fallen angel, and his eyes confirmed that, though it was a different one than the last - a very attractive, black haired and dark-eyed female fallen angel. "Have you come to kill me, fallen angel? Please, just hurry up and do it, I don't want to have to go on anymore - you can at least grant me that, can't you, God?"

"A devil praying to God, how ironic - you _do_ realize that God can't help you, any more than he can help a fallen angel, right? Or do you _not_ know, because you're a new devil? Either way, you're going to die, again - because Dhonasheek can't have you surviving, you see?"

"I understand," Issei said solemnly, thinking, _I can finally end it. I can't be brought back if I've already been brought back, right? So this is the hour I die - the hour in which I can finally stop _feeling_! I know that this is the only way - the only way that I can feel peace!_

"Do you now? Good," the fallen angel purred. "Then die!" Issei felt his eyes start to burn, but kept them open through the force of will. _I must see myself die - I can't close my eyes. _However, Issei's left eye began tearing, and burned even more, so Issei closed it while keeping his right open.

The instant he shut his left eye, Issei felt a feeling of calm - of nothingness, really - come over him, and then saw the fallen angel's fingers start to vanish into darkness, then the darkness vanished. She screamed, and beat her wings, but Issei noticed them evaporating as well. _What's happening? Why is this - It's my eye, isn't it? If I shut it, this will stop, and if I open my other one, it'll burn, but this will stop too. Which one? I need to see, so I'll just open my left eye, then._ Issei opened his left eye through the pain and the infinite peace that had come over him, and suddenly the peace disappeared, replaced by a slight amount of fear and a similar amount of sadness.

_ It has to be this way, though, _Issei told himself, trying to strengthen his resolve as the fallen angel recovered. _Otherwise I'd go through life fearing death, and fearing everything. I need to release everything. _Everything_. I need to get rid of it all. _

"You insolent boy!" the fallen angel spat. "You get rid of my fingers and part of my wings? I'll _torture_ you before I let you die!" A spear of light appeared in the air, and flew straight at Issei's right hand. Issei tried to put his head in front of the spear, so that he wouldn't have to suffer needlessly. However, the expected pain never came. Issei looked up in surprise, and saw Yuuto standing in front of him, a shining sword in his hands.

"Run, Issei, we'll handle this," were the words that Yuuto told Issei, in the calmest voice he'd ever heard from anyone. Issei wanted to protest, but knew that Yuuto wouldn't understand.

"Alright," Issei replied, trying not to cry more. _I was so close to being free! Why did my eye have to - to do what it did?_ He ran off the porch, going onto the sidewalk, and saw, as he looked back before making it all the way to the other side, Yuuto and the fallen angel fighting with each other, and a look in Yuuto's eye of tireless determination.

_So this is what he looks like when he fights?_ Issei wondered. _That's pretty... cool._ Yuuto swung his sword at the fallen angel, but she dodged, and sent a spear of light hurtling towards Yuuto's stomach, which was sliced in two by the sword. Again, Yuuto attacked, but it looked clumsy, in a way, to Issei, as if he had tripped on something. The fallen angel evaded it with apparent ease, and was about to send a spear into Yuuto's back when a burst of lightning struck her, making wounds appear all over her body, then eventually only one black feather remained in a pile of ash.

_What the hell..._ Issei thought. _I don't want to get on whoever's bad side that lightning bolt was. _

"Issei, are you alright?" two voices asked at the same time, one Yuuto's and one Akeno's. Issei heard footsteps from two directions, one from next to his house and one from the opposite direction. Issei looked at Yuuto, who had placed a hand on his shoulder. "Don't run away, please -"

"I'll do what I want!" Issei said, tears rolling down his cheek, and Yuuto smiled.

"Yes, I think you will. But still, we'd like you to stay with one of us, if you don't have any family, otherwise something bad could happen to you."

"I don't care about that! I just want it to end!" Yuuto's face immediately became concerned.

"What do you want to end?" came the question Issei had been anticipating, and he responded,

"Everything! My pain, my life - all of it!"

"My, are you sure? You can end your pain without ending your life, you know," Akeno's voice sounded from behind Issei. "Or at least deal with it in a productive manner."

"But who'll look after me now that grandpa's dead? No one!"

"Didn't you hear me before, Issei? I told you that we'd like you to stay with one of us. _We'd_ take care of you, don't you understand? Of course, we can't replace your family, but we could become your friends, couldn't we?"

"But why? Why would you do that?" Issei whispered.

"Because my peerage is like my family," Rias's voice said from in front of Issei. "We all take care of each other. I saw potential in you, potential to become a great Sacred Gear wielder - but first you'll need friends, so that you can deal with your sadness." Issei didn't reply. He didn't think he needed to, since the answer was already obvious.

_I _don't_ have potential, I'm not good enough! Why do they keep pretending to not see that?_

"You may not think you're good enough, Issei," Yuuto stated. "And maybe for some people, you're not. But we're not those people. We _care_ about you, since you're a member of Rias's peerage. We can take care of you, give you a place to live where you have at least a person to talk to, someone that can grow to understand you. And we're not going to understand you like your family, at least not at first."

"But we _can_ grow to learn about you, and maybe we won't know everything about you, but that's ok. We don't _need _to know everything, just enough. And for now, you've shared enough about yourself for us to welcome you as one of our own."

"Come home with one of us, Issei, and we'll show you that not all the happiness in the world is gone," Yuuto finished, and Issei's tears were pouring down his face. Issei felt a pair of arms wrap around him, and for the first time since his parents died, he felt completely, truly safe. "We'll help you deal with your problems, and we'll love you." Issei nodded, and then let his body be supported by Yuuto, going limp with the stress and emotions that he felt.

"Thanks," he said.

"You're welcome," Yuuto replied. "Let's go home."


	5. Chapter 5: Reality Comes and Bites

**A/N: For all of you complaining about short chapters, here's one that's not as short! (It's almost 3000 words, almost three times my first chapter!) Hope you all enjoy, and, as always, review, favorite, and follow!**

Chapter 5: Reality Comes and Bites

"We're going to teleport to my and Rias's house, Issei," Yuuto told him, and Issei nodded. "Akeno might stay there for a bit, too, if you're ok with that. Are you?" Issei nodded, still limp in Yuuto's arms, and Rias intoned,

"Then we're going." Issei felt the teleportation circle take him away, red light shining through his closed eyelids.

###

Issei felt his body come back into being, and let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. He looked around and saw a long hallway with five or so doors on each side, and midnight black carpet and blood red walls. When he looked up, he saw a ceiling of a double helix of the same red as the walls and the same black as the carpet, on a silver field.

_Wow, this place is... amazing. I wonder how much Rias's family - or Yuuto's - paid for this. To have this long a hallway, this place must be huge! _

"Issei, your room is this one," Rias said, pointing to a room on the left. "Yuuto's going to be in the room just next to you, so if you have a problem, talk to him, or even me, because I'll be across the hall." Rias pointed to the door directly across from Issei's door, and he nodded comprehension. "We'll be in the common area, it's that way, to the right out your door. If you get hungry, don't hesitate to come out."

"Why don't you think he'll be coming with us?" Akeno asked, smiling evilly. Yuuto shook his head, and Issei watched gratefully as Yuuto stood up for him.

"Issei's had a rough day, and you think he wants to spend more time around people he barely _knew _before today? Give him a break! He needs to rest, I can tell he's an introvert, so just, well, give him a break!" Akeno put her finger to her lips, and chuckled lightly.

"Alright, Yuuto, point made," she said, and walked off to the left, presumably to the common area, and Rias followed, with Yuuto whispering,

"If you feel scared, you can always come into my room during the night - I won't mind," and following the two that had gone before.

Issei nodded, and went into his room.

_This is beautiful..._ he thought in wonder. Black was interwoven with red and silver, creating a beautiful matrix that went all over the floor, the walls, and the ceiling. In the center was a four-poster bed, with blood red curtains and black sheets, that somehow matched the pattern.

Issei sighed, and threw himself onto the bed, shutting his eyes and planning to take a nap, knowing,

_I'm so exhausted, and I can't even tell what time it is. I should get some rest._

###

Yuuto walked behind Rias and Akeno, going to the common area, as it was called at his and Rias's house. His thoughts, though, seemed to be staying in one particular place.

_Issei. He's really... interesting, and he seems really, I don't know, reserved, and sad. Which makes sense, because of his history, but he seems like he doesn't expect the world to have anything good in store for him, like no one could ever like him, because of his thinking that "I'm not good enough". That probably has something to do with it, I don't think he realized what he was saying._

_ I hope that he can just stay with us, and learn to become whole, because it's sad to be around him, to be reminded of his past, to see the consequences of it on his present self._

_ His childhood is on par with mine, in terms of sheer tragicness, except that he was older when he lost his parents. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, since he had time to _know_ his parents, and then have them taken away. _

_ And it doesn't look like he's had any friends, either. At least when I was in the Holy Sword Project, I had those around me to support me, and I could support them. He's had no friends in the places he's been - school, the community, no one to help him but his family. _

_ But we're the same, in that we both got our supports snatched away from us by God. That, more than anything else, should unite us, should make us become friends - if I can find the right time to tell him, that is. _

_ Ah, Issei. You remind me of myself, yet you're so different. _Then a different voice in his head added, _And you're so cute, too._ Yuuto's thoughts immediately swirled in on the last one. _What did I just think? No, he needs support from friends, I shouldn't be trying to be a romantic partner at this point. _The different voice heard that and took it to the next logical point. _But when he's better..._

Yuuto shook his head, and tried to make the thoughts go away as he reached the common area. He didn't want to have to deal with the thoughts, so he focused on what he sensed. Akeno and Rias had been talking, so Yuuto knew that they probably didn't see him shake his head. He sat down on one of the couches, and Rias and Akeno sat on another.

"Yuuto, you've been pretty quiet today. Does that have anything to do with Issei?" Rias questioned.

"Hmm? Oh, yeah, probably. Are you guys hungry? I can make something."

"Hmm, that'd be wonderful, wouldn't you say, Rias?"

"Yeah, Yuuto, your cooking is always great," Rias agreed. Yuuto nodded, and went to the kitchen.

_Now what should I make that Issei might like?_

###

Issei woke to the smell of something amazing, and he blinked twice, trying to figure where he was when he opened his eyes.

_That smells like the fish Grandpa cooks - used to cook. _Issei's mood was immediately darkened, but in spite of that, he decided, _I'm going to see what that is._ Issei got off the bed, but the blood rushed to his head, and he let himself recover before stepping out the door, then wondering,

_Which way did Yuuto and the others go? It must be this way. _Issei followed the growing scent of the fish, and knew he was going the right way.

Issei reached the common area, and saw Yuuto bringing out plates and bowls of food onto a table there that had four chairs, two of them occupied by the other members of the Occult Research Club. Yuuto looked up, and Issei and Yuuto's eyes met, Yuuto's shimmering grey eyes looking straight into the heart of Issei's hazel ones. Issei broke the glance after a couple seconds, and said,

"Um, what did you make?"

"Oh, this is just some grilled salmon with a few added flavors," Yuuto responded, pointing to a plate with grilled fish on it. "There are, of course, other things - I made some anpan, along with rice, and I felt like making onigiri, so there's some with salmon in it. Also, I -"

"Yuuto made a lot of food for you, so you would be able to see what you like," Akeno said, smiling. Yuuto whirled his head to face her and made a face, from what Issei could see, but Issei found his left eye tearing up.

"Yuuto made this food for me?" Yuuto turned to look at Issei and nodded, saying,

"Well, the variety was for you, I mean, we have to eat too -" Issei walked the short distance between Yuuto and him, and threw his arms around Yuuto.

"You're so nice to me, Yuuto... why?" Yuuto quickly put his arms around Issei, firmly holding Issei, and Issei felt something in him relax, like a muscle he didn't know he had untensed.

"Because I like you, Issei - you have a nice personality, and you're part of the ORC now, so that means you're one of us," came the reply, and Issei tensed again, ready to deny it, but Yuuto continued before Issei could. "You _are_ good enough for us - we can train you as a devil, as a Sacred Gear possessor - and we can make sure that you never have to go through what you went through with your family again. Issei, we're like your family now -"

_No, these people aren't my family! I shouldn't be with them!_

"No, you're not!" Issei yelled, and wriggled out of Yuuto's arms and took a few steps back. "You're not like my family! My family is, was the only place I could be myself! I shouldn't be with you, because you're not my family!"

"Then where are you going to go?" Akeno inquired calmly. "All your family is dead. Yuuto's correct; we _are_ your family now."

"None of you understand -"

"_All_ of us understand, to some degree," Rias said, cutting Issei off. "Akeno has no family she wishes to see ever again. Yuuto has never even _known_ family; he was an orphan by the time he could remember anything. And I? The head of my household made decisions for me that I had no input in, so I've no desire to see him again. We've all created our own family, in the ORC, with people we've chosen. Do you want to be part of it? We all can get to know you, and while we won't ever have the same place in your heart that your biological family has, couldn't we get a different place, also in your heart?"

_What's she - I have my family in my heart, don't I? Is there any space for others? I don't think there is. _Issei then heard another perspective in his head. _A heart has as much space as you want it to have._ Issei retorted, _But what if I want my heart to stay the same? _The voice answered, _If you want to stay the same forever, in your state that you're in; the depressed state your mind is in, that's the way that will lead to an unfulfilling life. If you want something _new_, something to _change_, and you could be happier. _

_But do I want to be happier? _Issei wondered, as if in a separate place from the events around him, where he was just standing, not moving. _Do I _want_ a fulfilling life, or do I want to stay where I am - painful, but comfortable? I don't know, I don't know, I don't know! How am I supposed to know, without someone to guide me? How am I supposed to decide, without my family? I don't know, I don't know! _Issei fell to the ground, clutching his head. _How - What - Why - How - What - Why is it this way? How did this happen? What's the way to deal with this?_ Issei dimly felt a pair of hands touch him, then a pair of arms wrap around him, but was mostly focused on what was going on inside him.

_Can I be happy? Do I want to be happy? I don't know, I don't know, I - DON'T - KNOW!_

###

_Issei dreamed._

"Come on, quickly, we need to get Issei out of here!" a woman's voice cried, but then a man shook his head.

"No, he must stay!"

"Are you insane? You know what they'll do to him -"

"_And_ I know what will happen to everyone else if we take him away! Sacrifice him for the good of the many!"

"We have Issei right now! We don't know if they'll -"

"We _have_ to get Lia back! We need to do anything we can!"

"If Issei grows up with us, we can teach him to become powerful enough -"

"But we need Lia _now_!" There was more shouting, and then Issei heard a shattering sound.

"They're here! Put Issei down!"

"What? No, you -" Issei felt a sensation that he was falling, and then suddenly the dream collapsed, and he was sitting in a room with a man he remembered as his father, and he was saying,

"Be loyal to your family, Issei, and don't go away to others. You shouldn't be with other people than your family. Do you understand?" Dream-Issei nodded, and Issei felt a sensation that he was watching the whole thing, not just seeing through dream-Issei's eyes. "You're not good enough for anyone other than your family, Issei. You're not good enough to be with anyone but your family - you should stay loyal to your family, in order to protect yourself. In order to be safe, in order to be comfortable. You don't know what to do without your family."

"You're not -"

"Be loyal -"

"-good enough -"

"You don't know -"

"-to your family -"

"-for anyone -"

"-don't go away to others -"

"-what to do -"

"-other than your family."

"-you shouldn't be with -"

"-other people than your family."

"-you shouldn't be with -"

"-for anyone -"

"-without you family."

"Be loyal -"

"You're not -"

"You don't know -"

"-don't go away to others -"

"-for anyone -"

"-good enough -" The words just seemed to be never-ending, and Issei began to scream wordlessly, in pain as he struggled to make sense of something. All his world was pain, nothing else could be perceived. Issei tried to see, but he was blind, tried to hear, but his own screams were deafening, tried to feel, but all he felt was pain.

###

Issei woke up screaming, his consciousness returning to the world around him. He was in so much pain, pain was the only thing he could feel - and then it wasn't. He blinked once, then twice, and then saw the intricate ceiling of Rias and Yuuto's house above him.

_Yuuto. Rias. Akeno. I was brought to this house after I died and was resurrected, then I took a nap, and then I, I what? I followed the scent of the fish, and then Yuuto said that they were my family, and I got upset, because I shouldn't be with anyone but my family. _

_Wait, wasn't that in my dream? That my dad was telling me I wasn't good enough for anyone but my family, that I should stay loyal, that I don't know what to do without my family? Did someone tell me these? _

_What does that mean, then? Are all these things just things other people told me, instead of things I learned on my own? Are these beliefs... right? Yes, of course they are! If they weren't, then everything I know is wrong, and I _know_ it's right! It can't be wrong! _

_Except that Yuuto and Rias seem to want to help me - but I have to stay loyal to my family, and I'm not good enough for anyone other than my family!_

_ But my family's all gone, so what do I do? Can these people be my new family? Would that be betraying my family? No, it wouldn't, because they're gone now. _The left part of Issei's face felt about to explode with the tension of the incoming tears, but Issei stayed with the train of thought. _They can be my new family, because they genuinely want to help me. I'm staying loyal to my family; I'm always going to remember them, but there's nothing else I can do for them now, since they've all passed on. I'm good enough for them, they've said, so therefore they're my family. _

Issei sat up, then waited for the dizziness to go away, and found Yuuto, sitting in a chair next to the bed, looking right at him as he turned to the side.

"Issei, are you awake?" Yuuto asked, voice weary sounding.

"Yeah, of course I am. I'm sitting up, aren't I?" Issei replied. Yuuto's eyes widened, and he turned pale.

"You're... really awake? You're awake! Issei, you're awake! Guys, Issei's awake!" The last part was yelled, as if Yuuto were trying to get the message to someone outside the room.

"What's the big deal? Of course I'm awake, I was just sleeping, right?"

"Issei, don't you remember? You collapsed onto the ground after I said we were like your family -"

_Wait, that wasn't part of the dream? I collapsed after that? Everything's a blur..._

"Everything is kinda blurry," Issei replied, and then the door burst open, with Rias and Akeno charging in.

"He's really awake?" Rias questioned, and Yuuto turned to Rias and nodded. Rias's eyes widened, and her eyes began to glisten. "Thank Satan!"

"My, that's great, Issei!" Akeno said. "How are you feeling?"

"Blurry," Issei responded. "And I've decided that you guys are my new family, since I can't do anything else for my old one anymore. If you'll have me, that is, I know I was a jerk, really, but -" Yuuto abruptly hugged Issei fiercely, and, sounding like he was crying,

"Thank Satan, Issei. Just remember that you'll always be good enough for us, no matter what. I'm so glad!" Issei felt two more pairs of arms wrap around him, and began to cry, tears flowing like a river from his eye.

_It feels good to have a family again._


	6. Chapter 6: Recollection of Violent Night

**A/N: Sorry about how long this took. I wasn't in the muse, so I got back in it. That was hard. Thank you to all of you followers, favoriters, and reviewers! It really helps me out!**

Chapter 6: The Recollection of a Violent Night

"So, let me get this straight," Issei was asking Yuuto, after Rias had left to go to school the day after he woke, along with Akeno. "I was in a coma for three and a half days, sat up repeatedly and screamed, and you couldn't wake me up?" They were both sitting on a couch in the common area, and Issei was sitting about six inches away from Yuuto.

"Yep, that's right. We had to pour water down your throat so you wouldn't get dehydrated."

"Ok, but I don't feel hungry now, so how is that possible if I didn't get any food?"

"Your demonic life force fed you, in a sense, so you should eat enough for the next few days to make sure it gets replenished," Yuuto told Issei, smiling.

_Yuuto's always smiling, it seems like. Why? Is he generally a happy person? But he's an orphan, like me, so how could he be happy, if he has a past like that?_ Issei decided to ask about it, even though he wondered if it would be considered impolite.

"Why are you always smiling?"

"I'm not always smiling," Yuuto denied, but Issei shook his head.

"You do, at least around me."

"Well, then it's you, isn't it?" Yuuto said, still smiling, and Issei wondered what he meant, then put it out of his mind.

"What... was I screaming? When I was in the coma, I mean," Issei asked, and Yuuto's face fell.

"Things like 'I'm not good enough', 'I need to be loyal', and 'I shouldn't be with others than my family'. It was... frightening. What do you remember?" The last part was said gently, but it felt like a sword thrust to Issei's mind, so he glanced down and replied,

"I don't remember anything from when I was in the coma, just... pain."

"That would fit," Yuuto said. "Considering that you were screaming as if you were burning alive."

"Yeah, I only remember screaming when I woke up," Issei lied, still looking down.

_I can't tell him about what I saw, since he wouldn't understand. _

"Do you feel good enough to go to school tomorrow, Issei?"

"Sure, I guess," Issei responded, and Yuuto smiled, then asked,

"Well, would you like some food? I mean, the food I made for the other day is gone, but I can easily make some new things."

"Sure, that'd be great, Yuuto," Issei responded, looking up, now a smile on his face too. "That'd be really nice." Yuuto's smile grew wider, and he got off the couch and went to the kitchen, leaving Issei with his thoughts.

###

After Issei had eaten, he lay down on his bed with Yuuto sitting on a chair next to it. Yuuto was telling Issei a story about a time when he, Rias, and Akeno got trapped in a church that belonged to the angels, and was very jovial, always making cracks at his companions, like, "If Akeno and Rias could move as fast as I could, we'd have been out of there in a flash", "If Akeno could've seen two feet in front of her face in the dark, like Rias and I can, we wouldn't have been caught by that angel patrol", and similar things.

Suddenly, near the end of the story, Issei felt the tears start in his eye, and winced, hating the fact that he had to cry. He tried to stifle the tears so that Yuuto wouldn't be bothered, but Yuuto noticed, and his face took on an expression of extreme sadness.

"Issei, what can I do to help you?" Yuuto asked as Issei broke down in tears, and curled in a ball, arms around his legs, face in his knees. Issei managed to choke out,

"Give... me a hug," and Yuuto obliged, his strong arms holding Issei tight while tears fell like rain off Issei's face, Issei's sobs like thunder, his shudders like lightning. "Why do the storms have to always fall over me?"

"That doesn't matter," Yuuto said, and hugged Issei tighter. "What matters is that I'll always be there to weather the storm with you."

"Really?" Issei said in between sobs. "You'll... really be there?"

"Of course," Yuuto replied, and took off his indoor slippers to get on the bed with Issei. "I'll be there for you, always. No matter what, I'll always support you, Issei."

###

"Issei, you need to get up, because you said you would go to school today! Yuuto told me!" a female voice called, and Issei heard his door open, then footsteps close to his bed. "Issei, you need to - what the hell?" Issei opened his eyes and saw Rias standing next to the bed, and then flicked his eyes over to where he felt a warmth, and then saw that the warmth was Yuuto.

"What? It's too early to be yelling, Rias," Yuuto said groggily, then Issei saw him open his eyes. "Wait, what? Issei, what're you doing in my bed?"

"This is my bed, Yuuto," Issei replied. "I think."

"Did a development happen while I wasn't here?" Rias demanded, and Issei hastily shook his head.

"I think we just fell asleep when I was crying, since I was tired, and Yuuto probably was too," Issei said.

"My, what do we have here? Who was the seme and who was the uke?" Akeno said, and Issei heard the footsteps, then blushed as he processed the words.

"We didn't do it!" Issei said forcefully.

"Well, that's good to hear, since that means I can still be the one to take Issei's virginity," Akeno said, and Issei could _hear_ the sadistic smile in her voice. He sank under the covers, blushing furiously.

"Akeno, don't even start," Yuuto told Akeno, but Akeno snarked back,

"My, but I've _already_ started, so how can I not start?"

"Both of you, cut it out," Rias said, and then spoke to Issei. "You need to get ready, Issei, so get up and get dressed. We got your clothes from your house, and brought them here."

"How -"

"We're devils, we can open simple human locks, Issei," Rias said, cutting him off.

"Oh," Issei replied. "That makes sense."

"Everyone except Issei, get out of here so he can get ready," Rias ordered. "He'd feel

even more embarrassed if we stayed."

"I'll just teleport back," Akeno said, and a magic circle flashed, and she was gone.

"Show-off," Yuuto muttered, and proceeded to get up and walk out the door, Rias being

the last and shutting the door. Issei got up, rubbing his eyes, and got read for school.

###

Issei walked next to Yuuto, behind Rias, who was next to Akeno into Kuoh Academy, and he heard whispers that he couldn't quite understand.

_Probably either about my existence with this group or my being back. I'm guessing the first, considering no one knew me, but who knows? Maybe someone suddenly developed a liking to my shitty personality!_ Issei thought the last part sarcastically, then noticed his face was contorting in a weird way, and relaxed it. _Am I _that_ bitter?_ he wondered, but put the thoughts out of his mind and just kept walking through the chilly air of his life mentally and physically.

Eventually Rias and Akeno went to their class, and Issei and Yuuto went to their class that, apparently, they shared. Issei sat down at his desk, closing his eyes and just letting the incomprehensible whispers of his classmates wash over him like water, not affecting him at all, as if he were stone.

_Except water can bring sand into the ocean, and carve rock, if there's enough of it,_ Issei thought. He hated when he came up with metaphors that were _too_ accurate. _And there certainly is a lot of it._

Issei caught Yuuto's eye, who was giving him a reassuring smile.

_That's right. I have people who care about me, even if these people don't._ Issei kept running that thought through his mind, making himself smile to Yuuto every once in a while.

###

Issei was packing up when Yuuto came over and laid a hand on his shoulder.

"You ready for club?" Yuuto asked, and Issei was sure he heard a gasp somewhere in the background, but he ignored it, nodding. "Good."

"What exactly do we, well, do in the ORC?" Issei asked Yuuto, and Yuuto responded by saying,

"We research the occult in a club, pretty much," then gave Issei a wink that Issei interpreted to mean, "I'll tell you later".

Issei and Yuuto walked out of the new school building and over near the old schoolhouse, the chilly air biting at Issei's cheeks.

"Wait, this is where your club is?" Issei asked, bewildered. "How'd you get this place?"

"Well, we have connections, and this way no one has a reason to come over here, except those in the ORC and the student council," Yuuto replied.

"I, I see," Issei said, nodding while thinking, _What kind of connections? And why would the student council want to come here? To make sure we're using the budget appropriately?_ They walked in the building, and Issei was relieved to feel the heat of a fire in the room. He also saw two figures sitting in chairs near the fire, with two other chair vacant.

"Hey, Rias, Akeno," Yuuto greeted. "I brought Issei, so what do you want to do?"

"Well, we received a mission from my brother," Rias said. "Sirzechs wants us to take out a rogue fallen angel that's been harassing devils. In other words..."

"The guy that killed Issei," Yuuto said, grim determination evident in his voice. "Then what are we waiting for? Let's go."

"Well, we need to see if Issei can control his eyes," Rias stated, standing up and turning to Yuuto. "From what I've heard from my brother, no one in history has ever had both the Dark Eye and the Eye of Light in their possession."

"So, that means what?" Issei questioned, curious.

"That means that, for all intents and purposes, you're considered a 'Danger Class Two' entity, which means that your abilities are unknown, which, in turn, means that you're technically not allowed on sensitive mission until you've been examined by the head of the household," Rias explained, looking right at Issei. "So I need to examine your eyes with magic, and get a sense of what they do."

"Um, will it hurt?" Issei asked cautiously.

"My, who can say?" Akeno asked facetiously, standing up. "All I know is that if it does, it'll be great to watch!"

"You're terrible, Akeno," Yuuto said smoothly. "One might think you wanted to hurt another member of your mistress's peerage."

"Knock it off, both of you! You've been like bickering children ever since we saved Issei!" Rias turned to Issei. "No, it shouldn't. You ready?"

"Um... yes?" Issei half-asked, half-answered.

"Good." Rias breathed in deeply, and Issei felt a strange feeling in his eyes for a second, and it was gone in the next. Issei looked at Rias, whose eyes were staring wide open at Issei. "You might be able... to have the power of a top class fallen angel, a Satan, or God, if you train enough. Your left eye creates anything, positive or negative, but your right eye _un_creates, making things non-existent. Essentially, with enough practice, you're unstoppable."

"What?" Issei said, not sure of the correct response to that. "I can be what?"

"You could become Satan," Rias stated, her face calm again. "Or God, or the top class fallen angel - since you can create and uncreate anything, you could change what you are, anything is possible."

"My, so Issei could become more powerful than all three leaders, is what you're saying?" Akeno asked, smiling. "Isn't that nice, Issei?"

"No! No, I don't want to be powerful! I don't want to lead! Just, no!"

"But you could be so much better than you are now, Issei, don't you want that?" Akeno asked, her face intense.

"No! No! I don't want to be powerful, not at all!" Issei ran over to a chair and curled up in it, trying to make their words not affect him.

_I don't need to be powerful, not at all! I just want to be... to be..._ Issei couldn't find the right word, and he kept running the thoughts in his head, making sure that he knew he didn't want to be powerful. _I don't need it, everything's fine the way it is!_


	7. Chapter 7: Confessions of a Love Unknown

Chapter 7: Confessions of a Love Unknown

**A/N: Sorry this took literally forever. I kinda stopped working on this, and I'm not sure how much more I'll be updating. I at least want to get through a major plot point I have planned. Thanks to DarkPlasmaDragon for reminding me about this!**

Issei was in his room when he heard a knock on the door.

"Come in," he said, and Yuuto walked in, his face serious. "What's wrong?"

"Rias and Akeno went out on a mission to find a magical artifact, but they still haven't come back. It's been twelve hours since they left, and they haven't contacted me. Something's wrong."

"So, are we going to do something?" Issei asked.

"Yes, we are. I just want to make sure you're up to it."

"I mean, I don't really like how they want me to be powerful," Issei said, and Yuuto's face fell. "But I don't want them to die, so I'll help you. What do I need to do?" Yuuto brightened, and replied,

"I just want you to try and help out if you can - you don't need to do anything you don't want to," Yuuto said kindly.

"Where are they?" Yuuto looked down.

"They're in fallen angel territory, trying to retrieve a Sacred Gear from a human they have captive. The Sacred Gear is called 'Sunrise Burning'. It allows the bearer to make light into fire." Issei flinched.

"How'd the person get caught?"

"She was taking a walk in the woods - and then couldn't defend herself without light."

"When do we leave?"

"Now." Yuuto flicked his fingers, and a magic circle appeared beneath Issei and Yuuto. "Don't worry, I'll protect you with my life." As the magic circle warped them away, Issei wondered,

_What could be keeping Rias and Akeno, that we could help with?_

_###_

"We're here," Yuuto announced. "This is the place they teleported to. But no sign of them," he said, looking around the forest. Issei followed suit, looking for anything that could lead them to Rias and Akeno.

"Issei, over here," Yuuto said, pointing to a trail of fallen angel feathers. "I think they went this way - at least the fallen angels."

"Got it," Issei said, looking around for anything that could mark a place that the fallen angels would be. He followed Yuuto down a path, and eventually it led to an abandoned looking church. "They're in a church?"

"Most likely," Yuuto said. "Watch out!" he shouted suddenly, as a spear of light came rushing by, burying itself in a tree, inches from Issei. It dissipated, and Issei opened his left eye as wide as he could while shutting his right, trying to imagine a transparent shield in front of him and Yuuto. Another spear came, but it bounced off air, and Issei knew that it had worked.

"Good job, Issei!" a familiar feminine voice said. Issei turned and saw Rias, along with Akeno, behind a tree. "Now we can go in. That trap had us bogged down here - we couldn't risk it, not without knowing the potency of the spears, and without a healer."

"Um. You're welcome?" Issei half-asked, half-stated.

"Let's go, before Issei gets too tired to keep it up," Akeno said, and Issei concealed his shock.

_It's almost like she cares about me - wait, that can't be right, she's been teasing me since I got in the ORC, which means she doesn't. Only Yuuto does._ Issei and the rest of the ORC walked through the woods, Issei flinching whenever a spear of light came his way.

Issei and the others got to the church, and saw the trap that was shooting spears of light. After one shot, Akeno ordered,

"Issei, drop the shield." Issei opened his right eye, and felt, somehow, the shield dissipate. Akeno raised her hand, and lightning struck from the sky onto the trap. Issei threw up his arms to protect himself as it exploded, but didn't feel anything hit his arms.

"Issei, it's ok. I'll protect you," Yuuto said, and Issei looked over at him, who had put a hand on Issei's shoulder. "You're safe."

"If we're done with the male bonding, we can go in now," Rias said as she walked into the church. "Hello? Anyone home?" Issei and the other two followed, but then heard a voice.

"Ah, if it isn't lady Rias. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance," a fallen angel Issei recognized as Dhonasheek said.

"Fallen angel, where is the artifact?" Rias demanded, and Dhonasheek shook his head.

"Not telling, devil princess! Now, fight!" Issei saw a dozen more fallen angels come out from the shadows, and he heard Yuuto swear.

"Fuck!" Issei saw thirteen spears of light appear, and saw Rias blast twelve of their bearers with red demonic energy. However, Dhonasheek's spear went past Issei, who sighed in relief as he saw him get blasted too, but then whirled around, hearing a choke, to see Yuuto with the spear through the left side of his chest, blood spattered all over him and the floor.

"Yuuto... no... NO! NO! NO! This can't be happening!" Issei cried, and fell to the floor, sobbing. "Why you? Why you?" Issei felt a sense of raging anger rise up in him, and turned back to where the fallen angel had launched the spear. "Why did you have to kill _Yuuto_? He was my friend - my only friend! Do the people I care about always die? Is this what that is? God! Bring Yuuto back to life!" Issei waited for a second or two, then continued his rant. "I never got the chance to tell him I loved him, and yet... and yet... now he's GONE! FUCK YOU, GOD! I HATE YOU - BRING YUUTO BACK TO LIFE!"

"Issei, we need to get out of here, so we can be safe - we didn't anticipate this kind of resistance," one of the other two ORC members said, but Issei didn't care. Tears were pouring out his eye, and Issei yelled,

"Eye! Bring Yuuto back!" He shut his right eye, and then saw Yuuto pick himself up, the wound gone. "Yuuto, you're back! I was worried for a bit there! You're back!" Issei went over to hug Yuuto, but when he tried, his arms passed right through him. "What? You're... not back? You're just, just an illusion? WHY COULDN'T MY EYE BRING YOU BACK, YUUTO? WHY NOT?" Issei collapsed once more, and began to sob, the world fading around him.


End file.
